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莎士比亚《Venus and Adonis》翻译 - 150

bmdn 2013-02-15 13:56:34 ( reads)

Thus stands she in a trembling ecstasy;

Till, cheering up her senses all dismay'd,

She tells them 'tis a causeless fantasy,

And childish error, that they are afraid;

Bids them leave quaking, bids them fear no more:—

And with that word she spied the hunted boar,

 


战栗晕极女神立; 

定神驱恐精气振, 

非分之想须无忌, 

惧若小童太过甚;

莫喊莫叫莫惊慌:

此时野彘入目光。

跟帖(13)

淘金客

2013-02-15 17:26:35

第三句: 恐惧如幻实不必

bmdn

2013-02-15 18:59:17

好!只是最后一句应该平声押韵

淘金客

2013-02-15 20:30:13

噢, 我一直没明白ABABCC里面韵的选择, 请解释一下。

bmdn

2013-02-16 09:45:46

你的韵没问题,只是降调

淘金客

2013-02-16 10:55:39

恩,5,6句升,那1-4句呢?

聚曦亭

2013-02-15 21:00:39

"劝众不必自忧扰" 怎么样,离原文意思靠近点。

聚曦亭

2013-02-15 21:11:17

明白你的意思,这样就不押韵了.

淘金客

2013-02-16 04:02:10

: ) ), 押晕了吧还押, 聚大侠, the furtherest distance in the world, ...

聚曦亭

2013-02-16 08:05:23

咫尺千里

淘金客

2013-02-16 09:20:45

聚侠,看来你是serious! 依我这里them指神志senses,不是众。?

淘金客

2013-02-15 20:35:15

韵梅亚好, :),和我一样。

淘金客

2013-02-16 04:05:37

The furtherest distance in the world is between knowing what is

bmdn

2013-02-16 09:47:18

挺好