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Nolie小弟提醒,发一下骑车的小红宝书

(2022-05-23 20:30:25) 下一个

刚开始骑车,急诊大叔就跟我说了这些,呵呵,我以为他们是开玩笑,结果发现他们会经常如数家珍地引用。真的是一群顽固不化的老教条。

最著名的是第五条,闭上嘴干活!呵呵,无数次在group ride时候听到这一条。

第七条也是骑手们引以为傲的,就是时刻手指,手臂,大腿都保持清晰可变的tan line,说明你是hard core。这是我夏天的大腿。

Velosure on Twitter: "Did you get out in the #sun this weekend? Where do  you fall on our #cycling tan guide? I'm somewhere between the newbie and  the pro! https://t.co/ZeKfP27GUB" / Twitter

第十二条和第二十五条,是很多丈夫们给自己打气的,相搭配的还有一句,my biggest worry, is when i die, my wife sell all my bikes wiht the price i told her. 哈哈哈

第十七条,不要穿team jersey,除非你是那个team的。也不要穿环法的黄色或者粉红点,那都是有特殊意义的。有时候看到有人穿了个sky的经典蓝黑纹,大家就知道是个newbie

第九十条,不管如何紧张胆怯,都要随时表现得很休闲镇定,坐在top tube上。我觉得这个姿势太帅了,但是我就是搞不出来。。。

Touching the ground from the saddle? - Page 2 - Bike Forums

 

  1. Obey The Rules.
  2. Lead by example.
  3. Guide the uninitiated.
  4. It’s all about the bike.
  5. Harden the f*ck up.
  6. Free your mind and your legs will follow.
  7. Tan lines should be cultivated and kept razor sharp.
  8. Saddles, bars and tires shall be carefully matched.
  9. If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period.
  10. It never gets easier, you just go faster.
  11. Family does not come first. The bike does.
  12. The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.
  13. If you draw race number 13, turn it upside down.
  14. Shorts should be black.
  15. Black shorts should also be worn with leader’s jerseys.
  16. Respect the jersey.
  17. Team kit is for members of the team.
  18. Know what to wear. Don’t suffer kit confusion.
  19. Introduce yourself.
  20. There are only three remedies for pain.
  21. Cold weather gear is for cold weather.
  22. Cycling caps are for cycling.
  23. Tuck only after reaching Escape Velocity.
  24. Speeds and distances shall be referred to and measured in kilometres.
  25. The bikes on top of your car should be worth more than the car.
  26. Make your bike photogenic.
  27. Shorts and socks should be like Goldilocks. (Not too long and not too short).
  28. Socks can be any damn colour you like.
  29. No European Posterior Man-Satchels.
  30. No frame-mounted pumps.
  31. Spare tubes, multi-tool and repair kits should be stored in jersey pockets.
  32. Humps are for camels: no hydration packs.
  33. Shave your guns.
  34. Mountain bike shoes and pedals have their place. (On a mountain bike).
  35. No visors on the road.
  36. Eyewear shall be cycling specific.
  37. The arms of the eyewear shall always be placed over the helmet straps.
  38. Don’t play Leap Frog.
  39. Never ride without your eyewear.
  40. Tires are to be mounted with the label centered over the valve stem.
  41. Quick-release levers are to be carefully positioned.
  42. A bike race shall never be preceded with a swim and/or followed by a run.
  43. Don’t be a jackass.
  44. Position matters.
  45. Slam your stem.
  46. Keep your bars level.
  47. Drink Tripels, don’t ride triples.
  48. Saddles must be level and pushed back.
  49. Keep the rubber side down.
  50. Facial hair is to be carefully regulated.
  51. Livestrong wristbands are cockrings for your arms.
  52. Drink in Moderation.
  53. Keep your kit clean and new.
  54. No aerobars on road bikes.
  55. Earn your turns.
  56. Espresso or macchiato only.
  57. No stickers.
  58. Support your local bike shop.
  59. Hold your line.
  60. Ditch the washer-nut and valve-stem cap.
  61. Like your guns, saddles should be smooth and hard.
  62. You shall not ride with earphones.
  63. Point in the direction you’re turning.
  64. Cornering confidence increases with time and experience.
  65. Maintain and respect your machine.
  66. No mirrors.
  67. Do your time in the wind.
  68. Riders are to be measured by quality, not quantity.
  69. Cycling shoes and bicycles are made for riding.
  70. The purpose of competing is to win.
  71. Train properly.
  72. Legs speak louder than words.
  73. Gear and brake cables should be cut to optimum length.
  74. V Meters or small computers only.
  75. Race numbers are for races.
  76. Helmets are to be hung from your stem.
  77. Respect the earth; don’t litter.
  78. Remove unnecessary gear.
  79. Fight for your town lines.
  80. Always be Casually Deliberate.
  81. Don’t talk it up.
  82. Close the gap.
  83. Be self-sufficient.
  84. Follow the Code.
  85. Descend like a Pro.
  86. Don’t half-wheel.
  87. The ride starts on time. No exceptions.
  88. Don’t surge.
  89. Pronounce it Correctly.
  90. Never get out of the big ring.
  91. No food on training rides under four hours.
  92. No sprinting from the hoods.
  93. Descents are not for recovery. Recovery ales are for recovery.
  94. Use the correct tool for the job, and use the tool correctly.
  95. Never lift your bike over your head.

 

这些其实最后归根结底,是enjoy your ride, be kind. be presentable. 其他就一笑而过吧。

其实我还是很怀念以前到处找century骑的逍遥时光。骑车彻底改变了我,从一个宅家吃小核桃的懒散女生变的积极乐观坚强。也认识了许多热爱骑车同样积极乐观的朋友们

自从开是大铁以后,每次骑行都是有计划有目的,变得很regimental,少了很多乐趣,因为这篇文章,我翻看着以前的照片,那是真的发自内心的快乐。这次打完大铁,要跟教练要求free ride,呵呵

 

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